get fat, its the new sexy

♥ 6:49 AM

true true, got it right from a boy's mouth. - " its bullshit, don't ever believe in that. "

thanks yo, I needed a wake up call. Just that there's a problem. I need a wake up call every hour. It's good to have someone who knows about it too, and high-fives with you. Alright, I'm not gonna believe in that. Its just total bullshit. The serious kind. I'm not dumb yo. I needed to shake some sense out of me. And i've got it. Say bye to all.

School's been good, I'm happy! Gym today was SHIOK. We had alot of jumping and sprinting. Then we ran the long distance kind to end it all. Being anemic isn't fun though, i wished I was well. Then I can keep going at it for hours. Alright, and seeing those AUT people, I really can't wait for next year. Its a great thing to be happy. And I'm really happy that I'm happy now! It wasn't easy to break through you know, blah blah.

Right, Nationals, as in my event, is gonna be in 2 days time. Gosh, you can never know how excited and happy I am about it. Its my last shot at nationals, and ive always loved nationals cause you get to see friends from everywhere. Practically all four directions in singapore. And i know its gonna be so crowded, it only makes me even happier! There's this goal that I have too, its really a big thing on my mind, but Im not gonna get too ambitious lest i become careless.

Okay, I was just thinking about this yesterday. Maybe my mom and I could migrate to Australia and I would study and work there to ensure she gets a good life. It sucks to see her working so hard. I promise, I will bring her comfort and everything she has ever need just cause she's my mom. AND! I really wasn't kidding when I kept mentioning that I wanted to study in Harvard, Cambridge or Yale. Its like my dream, and I know how to get there. So, you might really see me in one of those schools a few years from now. Trust me. My childhood dream was to work as a lawyer you know. I don't mind brushing up on my language too, language is what I hell love! Or maybe I could study english literature in Cambridge. I hell love lit too! I used to write poems when I was young. And I had a tiny book in which I wrote in everyday. Then I would have 2 golden retrievers. That really was my dream life when I was still a child. Its still my dream right now. I would marry some caucasian. haha. And since I'm gonna brush up on english, I won't have to fear for any communication barriers.

I would be standing in front of shinyi for nats! I was damn excited and happy when I saw YHSS behind mine in the list. Not lihui, but still, someone I know! I would really call it fate baby, if its lihui. And damn, the swimmers won't be in class for these few days. It wouldn't be as fun yo. I threw away my timetable. Haha, I get through school with nothing in my bag. OH OH! and i'm happy about tmr! Cause its swimming's nats, and that means SJC is gonna be there. I was just helping with the name list with the com today, and goodness, I see so many SJC names in there. Yay, its gonna be held just right here in school, and I have no training, so you know what that means!

" Wanna talk about it honey? " that's real sweet. thanks.

by the lake

♥ 8:04 AM

burnt myself when i drank boiling water which i thought was cold water. now my tongue can't really feel anything. haha, some stupid shit of mine again.

my back's been hurting everday, seriously. It aches, hurts and feels sore. No matter how I stretch or crack the bones, its still the same.

I just threw out four huge bags of clothes for the salvation army. The moral of this is not to buy so much.

GSS ends tomorrow. Wei-ming's birthday tmr!

by the lake

♥ 3:01 AM

My eyesight's failing me lately. Even now I strain my eyes to read some girl's blog who has such a tiny font. She's Jodie's 'sister', btw.

Okay so, I took O's oral today. I didn't prepare myself, but the question was simple. Thank god. I kept pausing in between words though, and there's one word in the passage which the all of us kena-ed from it. And, the waiting room was damn cool. It had imacs, and obviously we had our itchy fingers all over them. Then we played with the ICs, by bending them till both ends touch. The fun part was after I had my turn. We had to wait in this soundproof music room till they allowed us to go, and we started messing around with the percussion in the room. We used whiteboard markers as drum sticks, plus some fists. Haha, I wonder how much those things cost. Also, around two days back, I met a group of ah-bengs on the road with abg and jods. Apparently, the last ah-beng wasn't really educated cause he took frogs for tadpoles. Then he went, " Hey, you wanna see some tadpoles? " and started grabbing his frogs from this plastic bag. Right, normally girls would just scream and run. But abg started yelling and scolding him which was truly funny. And jods got her middle fingers working. I was too freaked out by those slimy things so I could only manage some yays. But it was fucking funny i tell you. And we really had a damn fun day. Which before was some uncle riding on his bike shouting " Siao ah. " to us. Anyway, we were talking about the fake SHE thing today. And the three of us have plans on singing for campus superstar. Haha, and we already picked songs for our audition. In which are, Twinkle Twinkle Lil Star, London Bridge and Old Macdonalds. Maybe you could catch us on tv when it starts airing.

I lost almost every battle for dj max in class. holy shit.

Alright, school's been officially extended till module 6. Screw the person in charge. I just remembered how to do the triple f*ck thing anyway. And, almost everyone in class are traveling overseas. I wished there was some training camp for the whole month of july. Ohyeah, Nationals are next week. For swimming too! So maybe I can catch Sjc there. Its time to see how the farter's " I confirm win. " will come true anyway.

Next week's gonna be fun, with pool, please don't tell uncle koh

till then.

by the lake

♥ 9:50 AM

Heard your story friend,

it came from long away.

Hope you are doing fine,

cause life is too short to waste.

Just two words for your ears to take,

let go when its your decision to make.

Zohan is good, its horny and corny. At first I didn't understand why it was rate NC16. Now I do. The paper ring I got today is spoilt by now. I have to thank SS lessons too, if not I wouldn't have understood what Zohan is about.

The Happening is not thrilling enough. Its quite mild, though I got some shocks during the movie. I think Lady in The Water is even more scary. Anyway, I think I've really watched almost every movie that's showing now except for those I can't get through for.

I love Melissa! I wished we could train side by side. And try to cheat by putting two targets together, or shooting 5 shots lesser. It's Sentosa tomorrow! I bet I will have damn alot of trouble waking up again. Those drowsy pills are really effective. I can even feel its effect on the next day. And I realised I hate small kids, with the exception of new-born babies cause they are so quiet. Ohyeah, there was this mfking boy who tried to tick me off a few weeks ago at the theme park.

I went : How do you get into the seat?

Mfking boy : Aiyo you don't know how? So stupid.

I went : Shut up.

Mfking boy : You tell me shut up? You then shut up.

What a bastard. Just like that annoying little girl I always see.

One last thing, there's something I want to do. I heard this from a friend, and it goes like this. Its the english essay writing exams. There's a topic on courage. Just write " This is courage. " and hand it up. Haha, they can't really fail you too.

by the lake

♥ 4:55 AM

My flu is killing me, I hope it wouldn't drag till school reopens.

I trashed Yulin today, and I won Alex at 9 ball. Its sad to know though, that everyone wouldn't be playing much after school reopens.

School reopens again.

I tried archery again anyway, the target kept falling off. But it was great.

I had crocodile soup too. And crocodile meat.

by the lake

♥ 7:01 AM

I want to become a youth team archer.

I want to become a youth team *.

I want to top my class.

I want to clean up my room.

I want to major in management.

I want to top what i have for shooting.

I want to top my class in AUT.

I want to volunteer to help out in Sjc after july.

I want to get a ncap license.

I want to join hometeamns and help out too.

I want to remember all my friends' birthdays.

I want to keep going during physical training.

I want to enjoy my school food.

I want to keep my hostel room clean.

I want to make my teachers, coaches happy with my performance.

I want to bring my grandparents out for a nice date.

I want to play pool with my cousin.

I want to do well for my o levels oral.

I want to play netball well.

I want to swim for long.

I want to know all the countries in the world.

I want to be able to get oil for my weapon.

I want to take care of my hamster well.

I want to be able to take it to the vet when its sick.

I want to keep my current phone scratchless.

I want to keep my macbook working as when it came.

I want to meet-up with my seniors and catch up with them.

I want to volunteer to do shelving at the national library.

I want to be able to wake up in the morning.

I want to shoot alongside my best shooting mates.

I want to share successes with those team mates.

I want to go genting this year again with Jodie.

I want to stay in the better hotel though.

I want to take the superman ride again.

I want to take the dragon ride during lunchtime and scream at those dining in kfc.

I want to know how to write all those chinese characters.

I want to know what i'm doing.

I want to play dj max with lihui till both our psp run out of batt.

I want to go rjc with germaine, but I can't.

I want to see crystal the cat again.

I want to play poker and win when someone puts out all in.

I want to learn all the tricks in 3 people bridge.

I want to know how to fix the aircon, computer, tv, flushing system.

I want to learn about the wonders of the world.

I want to know about the bermuda triangle.

I want to keep my ipod working till youth olympics.

I want to use my cracked phone during youth olympics.

I want to visit isabelle at her penthouse again.

I want to stay over at xiaowei's house again, and watch X-man with them.

I want to know how to cook dishes.

I want to have a rainbow shining in my room when life is so down.

I want Prissy to be happy and as funny as she is.

I want to stop drinking green tea and bubble tea.

I want to be up to my english teacher's expectations.

I want to ace Biology for all the tests.

I want to know how to use the mac system.

I want to play dota.

I want to meet this hongkong star.

I want to go abroad with my cousins.

I want to play tennis with jeffrey.

I want to stay in the east.

I want to make parkway parade my third home.

I want to run on taonan's track.

I want to see my father.

I want to talk to him.

I want to call him.

I want my parents to be happy.

I want to study fengshui.

I want to learn about architecture for my dad.

I want to make a grave for my hamsters who have passed away.

I want my grandpa to be able to know what i'm talking about.

I want to be disciplined.

I want to be well versed in chinese poetry.

I want to learn German, Spanish, Japanese, Malay, Tamil, Italian.

I want to be a grade 8 for piano.

I want to know how to play yesterday with my guitar.

I want to help out in the old folk's home with celesther.

I want to see and meet up with coach soo chyi.

I want to tell her everything that has happened.

I want to tell her i really missed her.

I want to do massage cause I really need to.

I want to stop flunking shoots, and keep my mindset right.

I want to go backpack traveling with my friends.

I want to win the ticket to go watch this year's olympics.

I want to set my life in the right path.

I want to have a good marriage.

I want to let my mother enjoy her life.

I want to realize my dreams.

I want to be all geared up for youth olympics, and not let the chance slip away.

I want to carry on to olympics after that, and to make history.

I want to make a life out of my life.

I want to be on time to play pool tomorrow morning.

That's all.

My resolutions for the next half of 2008 and onwards.

by the lake

♥ 9:24 AM

I effing want a wild day. or maybe a wild week. till I have enough fun.

by the lake

♥ 7:32 AM

me: for 5 days?

cec: no, 5 weeks.

me: wth! only if my competition can last for so long.

by the lake

♥ 2:28 AM

haha, steamboat tonight. I love steamboat.

i feel like buying another set of ear piece. the new ones look beautiful!

haha, i did another complaint today.

the girl behind me kena.

alright, i wanna buy desperate housewives whole season.

and ohyeah, im gonna swim again next week. especially tanning.

I'm going to cdans too!

& archery, like finally.

well well, i thought i was gonna sleep through the whole shoot today. It's all quite a blur. I felt like i was dreaming.

by the lake

♥ 7:43 AM

kongrui and I can totally hit it off yo! haha, I can't believe that i've found someone who loves the arcade and pool as much as I do! haha. I need to cut a nail. just one nail. haha, and ha, im gonna go play mahjong and pool for the whole day, next week.

some waiter played blackjack with me today. he kept losing. ah ha, kidding.

my wrists hurt. I need some metal piece to even out the edges of my macbook.

oh oh! i miss cogs.

and germaine needs a pigeon. but i only have a hamster.

holy shit! i'm hungry. I can't possibly have dinner so late, its slimming suicide.

alright, as all of you can see.

I'M HIGH.

by the lake

♥ 5:18 PM

问世间情为何物，直教人生死相许。

我好希望能从着痛苦的声援爬出来。眼泪，都已哭干了。我不要再着样下去。我已经两天没吃东西

了。我求求你，放过我吧。伤和痛都会掩在心底，因为再多的语言都无法表达心碎的酸。虽说放

弃是一种美德但谁可曾尝过这放弃的滋味是何。

by the lake

♥ 7:34 AM

by the lake

♥ 6:02 AM

Seen a lot of broken hearts go sailing by
Phantom ships, lost at sea
And one of them is mine

.....

Sorry didn't mean to call you but I couldn't fight it
I guess I was weak, couldn't even hide it
And so I surrendered, just to hear your voice.

.....

Don't know how many times I said I'm gonna live without you,
And maybe someone else is standing there beside you,
But there's something, baby you need to know.
That deep inside me, I feel like I'm dying. I have to see you,
It's all that I'm asking.

......

Cario mio, my world's become so empty. The days are so cold and lonely
And each night I taste the purest of pain.

......

Let it go

If you want me ~~girl~~, let me know

I am down, on my knees

I can't take it anymore.

I walked from Yishun to Khatib mrt today. I don't know what to say. I cried. From Yishun, all the way till home. Someone in the train offered me a full pack of tissue. I really can't take it. I have never been so heartbroken before. I have never been so sad before. How i hoped, some car would bang me down, and then, I wouldn't have to suffer anymore. This pain inside, is killing me. Haunting me, anywhere I go, whatever I do. I really hope it would set me free. I feel so heartbroken, so totally heartbroken, I rather be dead. Give me a drink, give me screwdriver, give me bloody mary, give me anything, that wouldnt make me sane. I hoped I was stupid, i hoped i was dumb, so i wouldn't know anything.

by the lake

♥ 6:11 AM

SINGHUI IS 18. One less who can't buy alcohol.

This was how we started the trip off. The bus ride there wasn't very fun, and I was getting sick of playing dj max.

Oh he's finally smiling!

So at night after dinner, we went to play pool. The place was actually for 18s and above only. But the staff just motioned us in. There were alcohol there, cigarettes and all. And table soccer. We had some fun there, but the pool tables were pretty old and dirty.

You should look at her position. Like those kinda kung fu fighting position. aha.

She looks like she's from some magazine advertising for some jap food. Seriously.

Hazel has beautiful eyes. I'm mesmerized.

You know, i normally don't take photos like this.

Haha, that was how we got onto the bus through the pouring rain.

This KFC sucked. I swear. The service is freaking slow and the staff is freaking rude. Plus, we have ppl screaming their heads off on top of us every 5 mins.

Hey, i have 2 dogs.

Husband & Wife. Acting only.

OH, the affair!

Haha, compare the two pics.

I hope she doesn't get mad.

Wow, jodie sure has saloon effect hair.

Aquila looks funny. And look at how meng yong jumps. Its HILARIOUS.

This ride is freaking good. And i realised i could scream, really scream. Its also 360 degrees.

Jodie's hair is damn cool. We should cut it that way too.

BONUS PICTURE OF THE TRIP! :D He's actually our 2nd Campus Superstar Champion, oh well this picture really lifted my mood. Its so rare you see. And Hazel was saying, if we could catch Shawn around, which has such a low probability, we might see jersey 11 around. Ha, and it was very true!

I sucked at this. Totally. And the stupid guy in the picture so laughed at me. Plus, he didnt tell me where to aim and all, ass. But i was happy that i got 2 tight groupings. Ohyeah, they have electronic archery targets there too!

The trip was bad actually, for myself. Though i kept trying to do stupid stuffs to try to cheer myself up. I know, its just natural to feel so empty in life. I do feel upset, but I do do things to make things better. I don't give up just like that. I do make the first step.

by the lake